Uh oh... it's on!!

Who's the hotter newlywed: Tori Spelling or Jessica Simpson??

Tori Spelling insists her new reality show with husband Dean McDermott will be better than Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson's MTV show Newlyweds: Nick + Jessica. Although they are starring in the reality series Tori + Dean: Inn Love, where they run a real bed and breakfast, she says they won't be copying Simpson and Lachey's infamous antics. Spelling explains, "We think of it as Newlyweds at the next level. "We are still newlyweds, but we have a baby on the way and our careers and a new business, so it's kind of like Newlyweds, Part Deux."

Um.. the only way Tori Spelling's show is gonna be Newlyweds 2 is if the title is "Newlyweds: 2 Dogs: One Human, One Canine."

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It's not Halloween...

So, why am I staring at a giant fugly pumpkin?

I think she has the eyes of small children stuck to the front of her shirt. Gross. I guess she's replacing all the stuff she sold at her yard sale now. Hopefully she's buying something expensive for her husband because it's going to take a lot to keep him around at this point.



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Tori's Sale

Tori Spelling's "Shit I'm broke" sale is going on this weekend...

At about 6:30 a.m. on Friday morning, nearly 60 people began lining up in front of Tori Spelling's modest home in Studio City, Calif., for her yard sale.

Fans of Shabby Chic-style furniture and fine silver had a field day. Spelling watched as strangers went through every drawer, closest and armoire in her house; items such as a pair of silver cigarette dishes ($50), a silver Tiffany serving platter ($2,800) and a silver gravy boat and coaster ($45) were quickly snapped up.

Other items up for grabs ranged from a used Sephora lip gloss for $1, her dog Mimi La Rue's shampoo for $20, a used pair of Marc Jacobs round-toe shoes for $125 (a buyer talked them down to $100) and a pair of white Grecian urns for $7,500.

With a handful of reporters, a Channel 11 news helicopter and a crew from her upcoming Oxygen reality show on hand, the five-months-pregnant Spelling didn't quite seem at ease.

"This is a little weird, but I'm okay," Tori said. She's also doing well with her pregnancy, she said: "I feel good. No weird cravings. People always ask me that, but I haven't had any."

TV style expert Steven Cojocaru at one point blurted, "Is this for charity? Or does it go to Tori?" An estate-sale worker replied, "It's for Tori."

I don't really feel all that bad for her. Considering how horribly ugly all her stuff is, she should really see this whole thing as a blessing in disguise. It would be almost impossible for the new stuff she buys to be uglier than this. I mean come on:



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Tori Spelling raises money for another boob job

Tori gets some help from her hubby Dean while putting up "yard sale" signs:

Are the proceeds from this sale going to charity? No. This horseface is just broke and trying to make some quick cash to support her husband's meth habit and pay for her 8th boob deformation.

The sale announcement says:

Tori invites you into her house to shop her dazzling valley home, jewelry & closets contents sale. This represents much of her last 15 years of buying & collecting. Included are antique & vintage items from the 19th, 20th, & 21st centuries! French, Italian, Continental, American white wicker, shabby chic, and traditional furniture, crystal chandeliers & sconces, pictures & paintings, lamps, vanity, Tori’s personal jewelry, bric-a-brac, memorabilia, garden & patio, designer & casual clothes, shoes, accessories, photos, etc.

Damn!!! She's cleaning house! They'll be left sleeping on the floor and wearing the baby shower gifts. Look at Dean trying to figure out if he can make a run for it or not.

Tori feeds her baby

Pregnant Tori Spelling and her hubby Dean leave McDonalds:

You know her baby is loving that quarter pounder and Diet Coke!

Why does this woman wear her hair in pigtails all the time? You need to be cute to pull that off, cute and not old. The last time Tori was cute was the day before never.



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