Gold Digger

Mariah Carey, our favorite little drag queen next to Fergie of course, is creating her own line of tan in a can.

The singer is insisting she is beautifully bronzed on every night on her current 'Emancipation of Mimi' tour and has hired a personal tanning assistant, Jenny Phillips, to spay her before going on stage.

Mariah and Jenny, of Beverly Hills' exclusive Portofino Sun Center and Spa, have now teamed up to create an extravagant new fake tan made with real gold. Mariah's representative said: "She is on tour with Mariah and they are developing an exclusive line of bronzer containing real 24-karat gold dust."

Wow, huh. Gold dust. This is Tinkerbell's dream. The fact that Mariah even has a "personal tanning assistant" is so fabulously out of control! I would sooo hate to be that person. Who the hell wants to rub up on such a diva like Mariah. The whole time you have to chant in her ear that she's a size 2 and so incredibly tiny and you have to create muscles every. single. night. Pressure man. I'm actually ECSTATIC that she's coming out with this line. At least we won't have any more of the airbrush 'problem'. Y'all remember. Last year at Macy's July 4th Fireworks special when she suddenly had a fierce six pack yet still had some saddlebags for good measure. She's just trying to keep it real.

Snaps Tinkerbell. It's allllllllll you now.

[source]